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Forum "Korrekturlesen" - English-Summary
English-Summary < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
Ansicht: [ geschachtelt ] | ^ Forum "Korrekturlesen"  | ^^ Alle Foren  | ^ Forenbaum  | Materialien

English-Summary: Frage (beantwortet)
Status: (Frage) beantwortet Status 
Datum: 21:42 Di 17.02.2009
Autor: cheezy

Aufgabe
Summary


Johnny played a computer-game. After a time the captain said to him, that his alien fleet want to fly to earth. Then he said excited, if they arrived to earth, people can get trouble. Immediately the captain said, that he had mistranslated his language into English. And they want to go their home. Then Johnny moved his fighter forwards and the alien fleet pulled in behind of him. After a short time a green dot appeared ahead of him. This was because someone was firing at him. This was because someone was firing at him. Johnny moved his ship on the right side, then the enemy starlighter roared past on towards the alien ships behind Johnny. But the alien ships had surrended to the starlighter. But people who had played the game was trying to destroy the alien ships. Then Johnny shouted, that the alien ships doesn’t fight anyone. But some children had launched a missile. After a time Johnny thought, that it is a game. And nobody would be die or killed.
Then he pressed the Fire Button and keep pressing it. The starship hadn´t seen him and falled down.
He began to thought, that the things on the screen are not true. He looked on his watch and it was 6:30. Because he had to go another hour to school and then he sat in bed watching television. Finally he felt sick.

Hi Liebes Forum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kann mir bitte jemand meine geschriebene Zusammenfassung von einer Geschichte korrigieren?

Auf Zeiten und Grammatik. Rechtschreibfehler kann ich selber prüfen.

Danke Ich wäre sehr dankbar wenn mir jemand helfen könnte


        
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English-Summary: Antwort
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 22:28 Di 17.02.2009
Autor: monsterbacke

hallo cheezy!

also grammatikalisch hab ich versucht alle fehler zu korrigieren, aber du solltest dir vielleicht den ausdruck noch mal angucken (satzverknüpfungen und wortwiederholungen).
ich hofe ich konnte dir helfen!

lg monsterbacke

Johnny played a computer-game. After some time the captain told him, that his alien fleet wanted to fly to earth. Then he said excitedly, if they arrived to earth, people could get in trouble. Immediately the captain said, that he had mistranslated his language into English. And they wanted to go to their home. Then Johnny moved his fighter forwards and the alien fleet pulled in behind him. After a short time a green dot appeared ahead of him, because someone was firing at him. Johnny moved his ship to the right side, then the enemy starlighter roared past on towards the alien ships behind Johnny. But the alien ships had surrendered the starlighter. But people who had played the game were trying to destroy the alien ships. Then Johnny shouted, that the alien ships didn’t fight anyone. But some children had launched a missile. After a time Johnny thought, that it was a game. And that nobody would be killed.
Then he pushed the Fire Button and kept pushing it. The starship hadn´t seen him and fell down.
He began to think, that the things on the screen were not true. He looked on his watch and it was 6:30. Because he had to go another hour to school and then he sat in bed watching television. Finally he felt sick.

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English-Summary: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 22:39 Di 17.02.2009
Autor: mmhkt


> hallo cheezy!
>  
> also grammatikalisch hab ich versucht alle fehler zu
> korrigieren, aber du solltest dir vielleicht den ausdruck
> noch mal angucken (satzverknüpfungen und
> wortwiederholungen).
>  ich hofe ich konnte dir helfen!
>  
> lg monsterbacke
>  
> Johnny played a computer-game. After some time the captain
> told him, that his alien fleet wanted to fly to earth. Then
> he said excitedly, if they arrived to earth, people could
> get in trouble. Immediately the captain said, that he had
> mistranslated his language into English. And they wanted to
> go to their home. Then Johnny moved his fighter forwards
> and the alien fleet pulled in behind him. After a short
> time a green dot appeared ahead of him, because someone was
> firing at him. Johnny moved his ship to the right side,
> then the enemy starlighter (heißt das Ding wirklich "-lighter" - für ein Kampfflugzeug oder -raumschiff stelle ich mir eher vor, dass das "starfighter" heißen könnte. Aber das weiß ich eben nicht genau, es ist nur eine Vermutung.) roared past (soll das heißen: "donnerte vorbei" oder "raste donnernd vorbei" - dann schreibst Du besser: "passed roaring") on towards the alien
> ships behind Johnny. But the alien ships had surrendered ("to surrender" bedeutet "aufgeben, kapitulieren, sich ergeben - könnte es sein, dass die alien ships den Angreifer umzingelt, eingekreist, eingekesselt haben? Wenn ja, heißt das passende Wort "to surround")
> the starlighter. But people who had played the game were
> trying to destroy the alien ships. Then Johnny shouted,
> that the alien ships didn’t fight anyone. But some children
> had launched a missile. After a time Johnny thought, that
> it was a game. And that nobody would be killed.
>  Then he pushed the Fire Button and kept pushing it. The
> starship hadn´t seen him and fell down.
>  He began to think, that the things on the screen were not
> true. He looked on his watch and it was 6:30. Because he
> had to go another hour to school and then he sat in bed
> watching television. Finally he felt sick.  

Schönen Gruß
mmhkt


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English-Summary: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 23:59 Di 17.02.2009
Autor: cheezy

ich hab nochmal geschaut im buch es heisst starfighter ich hab mich verschrieben danke dass du mich darauf erinnernt hast :)

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