Summary < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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Hallo Zusammen ![[winken]](/images/smileys/winken.gif "[winken]") ,
Es wäre schön, wenn jemand meine Summary auf Grammatik und Rechtschreibung Korrektur lesen könnte.
Es ist nicht die ganze Summary, sondern nur die Mitte und das Ende.
However Nazir is not ready to marry because he neither does not want to be married by his father nor to marry a Pakistani woman. When the couple stand in frond of the marriage guests, he leaves the room. George is very disappointed and wants him to get out of the house. Nazir moves out and leaves the town to live with a Frenchman in Eccels to live in an homosexual relationship. He owns a shop where he sells huts.
The youngest son of the family, Sajid, who is very shy, has been uncircumcised because it was overlooked. George is emphatic about the circumcision. He goes against Sajid`s will and Sajid gets circumcised.
Tariq is the third oldest son. He does not like to be domineerd over. He falls in love with a Catholic neighbour girl and he goes in discotheques.
The family drives to Bradford because George wants to meet Muslim friends. They introduce George to Mr. Shah because Mr. Shah wants to couple his two unsightl daughters and Tariq and Abdul are potential bridegrooms. George sees photos of the daughters and finds both ugly but he has to say that they are beautiful. The men determine that Tariq and Abdul will marry Mr. Shah`s daughters but George does not want to announce his children this.
One night, Sajid overhears his parents and hears that his brothers shall marry. When Tariq hears it he has a outburst of fury. He finds the marriage clothes and the marriage presents and destroy them. His brothers and Meenah, his sister, try to stop him. This is successful when George comes home. They abscond from him and only Maneer, who is called Gandhi, tries to establish order. He is the most religious son of the family and he fullfills all religious demands. For example he wears a skull cap and prays every morning.
When George arrives and sees the chaos he beats Maneer and asks him who has make the disorder and has destroyed the marriage things. Maneer says that he does not now this because of solidarity towards his brothers and his sister.
George drags him to the fish and chip shop and roars at Ella because in his opinion Ella educates the children in a wrong way. He beats Maneer again and Ella tries to intervene. She fails and George trounces his own wife. Maneer has to much fear so he does not help his mother.
A few days later Mr. Shah, his wife and his daughters visit the family. Tariq and Abdul are obviously shocked about the two prospective brides. Saleem comes at home after lessons at the university. For George Saleem studies for his engineering degree ut in reality he studies art. He brings home his "work of art", the shame of a woman and after a few circumstances the work of art lands at Mrs Shah`s lap. Becauce of this family Shah leave angry and shocked the house. Ella wants George to leave the house, too.
Ich weiß, dass das viel ist, aber vielleicht kann ja dennoch jemand mal einen Blick drauf werfen.
Vielen lieben Dank,
Sarah 
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(Antwort) fertig  | | Datum: | 18:27 So 01.06.2008 | | Autor: | rainerS |
Hallo Sarah!
Hier meine Korrekturen und Kommentare.
> However Nazir is not ready to marry because he neither does
> not wants to be married by his father nor to marry a
> Pakistani woman. When the couple stands in frontd of the
> marriage guests, he leaves the room. George is very
> disappointed and wants him to get out of the house. Nazir
> moves out and leaves the town to live in a homosexual relationship with a Frenchman in
> Eccels to live in an homosexual relationship. He owns a
> shop where he sells huts.
Hütten??? Oder doch Hüte? 
> The youngest son of the family, Sajid, who is very shy, has not
> been uncircumcised because it was overlooked. George is
> emphatic about the circumcision. He goes against Sajid's
> will and Sajid gets circumcised.
>
> Tariq is the third oldest son. He does not like to be
> domineered over.
Vielleicht besser: to be dominated
> He falls in love with a Catholic neighbour
> girl and he goes in (in)to discotheques.
>
> The family drives to Bradford because George wants to meet
> Muslim friends. They introduce George to Mr. Shah because
> Mr. Shah wants to couplemarry his two unsightly daughters off and
"To couple" ist eher technisch gemeint (Eisenbahnwagen). "To marry ... off" ist besser, wenn auch ein bischen abwertend. Kommt drauf an, was du genau sagen willst. Wenn du es neutral formulieren willst, dann schreibe
"... Mr. Shah is looking for potential husbands for his two unsightly daughters ..."
> Tariq and Abdul are potential bridegrooms. George sees
> photos of the daughters and findsthinks both of them ugly but he has to
> say that they are beautiful. The men determine that Tariq
> and Abdul will marry Mr. Shah's daughters but George does
> not want to tellannounce his children this to his children.
>
> One night, Sajid overhears his parents and hears that his
> brothers shall marry. When Tariq hears it he has a outburst
> of fury. He finds the marriage clothes and the marriage
> presents and destroys them. His brothers and Meenah, his
> sister, try to stop him. This is successful when George
> comes home. They abscond from him and only Maneer, who is
> called Gandhi, tries to establish order.
Die letzten Sätze passen logisch nicht recht zusammen: sind die Kinder geflohen, bevor der Vater nach Hause kommt oder nicht? (Ich würde auch nicht "to abscond" verwenden, sondern "to leave").
> He is the most
> religious son of the family and he fullfills all religious
> demands. For example he wears a skull cap and prays every
> morning.
> When George arrives and sees the chaos he beats Maneer and
> asks him demands to know who madehas make the disorder and has destroyed the
> marriage things.
"things" ist nicht gut
equipment? accessories? paraphernalia?
> Maneer says that he does not know this
> because of solidarity towardswith his brothers and his sister.
> George drags him to the fish and chip shop and roars at
> Ella because in his opinion Ella educates the children in a
> wrong way. He beats Maneer again and Ella tries to
> intervene. She fails and George trouncesbeats his own wife.
> Maneer has too much fear so he does not help his mother.
Besser: "Manner is very much afraid, so ..."
> A few days later Mr. Shah, his wife and his daughters visit
> the family. Tariq and Abdul are obviously shocked byabout the
> two prospective brides. Saleem comes at home after lessons
> at the university. For George believes that Saleem studies for his
> engineering degree but in reality he studies art. He brings
> home his "work of art", the shame of a woman
Hmm, das deutsche "Scham" wird mit "private parts" übersetzt.
Ich nehme an, du meinst einen Frauenakt oder einen Teil davon. Wie wäre es mit "naked female torso"? Oder "a painting showing a woman's private parts"
> and after a
> few circumstances the work of art lands at Mrs Shah's lap.
Vielleicht besser: "The painting ends up in Mrs Shah's lap. "
> Becauce of this [redThe[/red] Shah family leaves angry and shocked the
> house shocked and angry. Ella wants George to leave the house, too.
Viele Grüße
Rainer
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Hallo Rainer ,
Vielen Dank für diese wahnsinnige Korrektur!
Allerdings habe ich eine Frage:
> When the couple stands in frontd of the
> > marriage guests, he leaves the room.
Warum stand mit s? Wenn man the couple durch ein Pronomen ersetzen würde, dann würde man doch they nehmen, also kein s am Ende des Verbes...
Liebe Grüße und noch mal vielen Dank,
Sarah
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(Antwort) fertig | | Datum: | 18:40 So 01.06.2008 | | Autor: | rainerS |
Hallo Sarah!
> Allerdings habe ich eine Frage:
>
> > When the couple stands in frontd of the
> > > marriage guests, he leaves the room.
>
> Warum stand mit s? Wenn man the couple durch ein Pronomen
> ersetzen würde, dann würde man doch they nehmen, also kein
> s am Ende des Verbes...
Mit dem Pronomen "they stand", aber: "The couple" ist Singular, Plural wäre "the couples".
Das ist im Deutschen ganz genauso:
Das Paar steht vor dem Altar, die Paare stehen
aber: Sie stehen ...
Viele Grüße
Rainer
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